12 Things for 12 Months

Jordan has officially been gone for one whole year!

Thinking back, it went by so fast! And I couldn’t be any more proud of my boy!!
This past year I have learned so much, and I know that he has too.

He has grown into a greater man than I ever thought was possible, and there is still yet another year to go!

As a way of celebration I thought I would post about what exactly has gotten me through the last 12 months, and hopefully will help me get through the next 12 to come.

The first thing that I can think of was my trip to Edmonton. Although it was only 5 hours from my home time, it was well beyond worth it. Saying goodbye to Jordan was one of the hardest things I have done, but at the same time, I know for a fact that it is the best thing for us. It’s a time for us to grow, and become who we are to become in preparation for the rest of our lives. And it makes it all worth it!

After saying goodbye for the next 24 months I drove home in silence… I mean, without the hysterical crying it would have been silence… It felt good to cry, because I knew that it was completely appropriate, as long as no one saw me. And after reading my “goodbye” letter I received my closure, it made this all ok. Of course there was going to be more tears, but I knew that I could do this, because I wasn’t alone. He would always be there for me just as he had previously been.

That was my strongest moment... amongst all the things I had been through and was about to go through I am able to look back on that moment and remember that I was strong, that I could do it and that it would all be worth it!! 

My boyfriend was gone.. I wasn’t going to see him for 24 months and there was nothing that I could do about it but to carry on, and that’s exactly what I have done, and continue to do.


 The second thing that I tried to do right away was to strengthen my relationships, not only with my family but with his.

Because my family went on holidays the week he left I was able to focus just on my family, and they were a great support to me.

My first summer without him, summer 2014 his mother, sister and aunt invited me to go to Arizona with them. I think that this really strengthened my relationship with his mom. I was able to get to know her a little bit more, and I will forever be grateful for that fun girl’s trip! Bethany was a harder relationship to develop, and I blame it on the age gap. But now as she has entered high school I wouldn’t trade my relationship with her with anyone elses in the world! She gives me something to look forward to each day, and life is never a dull moment. I am truly going to miss seeing her every day at school.

The third thing I want to mention is getting used to how much mail you receive verses what you send. First: DON’T EXPECT ANYTHING. It makes things that much better when you do get that first letter in the mail, even if it does take 3 months.

And Second: He really doesn’t need a package for every month, every holiday, and the random times you feel like sending one. Obviously he appreciates it, but this is his only time to focus on serving the Lord. Being distracted takes him away from that and it makes things so much harder. Let him know that you care, and that you are supporting him, and even if you need to write those letters that don’t ever get sent --that’s ok! Let him focus and remain focused, he will give you his complete attention after he has finished his mission! So don’t think you are a bad MG just because you didn’t send him a package for “Labour Day”. Its ok! 

Next is Making New Friends. It’s something really hard, and takes you completely out of your comfort zone but is so worth it! Especially if its another MG. I can tell you, nothing is more exciting than having another MG on your side. Being able to relate to each other is the best thing, especially when you just need a little pick me up! We are all going through the same thing allowing us to do this together, and get through those hard days when we feel so alone!

Going on Dates seems to be the one that only half the MG’s agree with. Lets face it, its awkward! Having to go out and get to know someone else is the last thing you want. Youd rather be with your missionary and not have to worry about the loneness that we all go through. Going on dates doesn’t mean that it has to be a one on one thing. For me I have been on 1 official date in the last year. I would way rather spend a night around the campfire, playing cards, or go to a movie with my group of friends. It allows me to look forward to when Jordan comes home, and share all my memories with him. 

 Number 6 is getting out of the house! It is something so simple, but for us MG’s it really is the last thing we want to do. Sometimes we hope that if we hide long enough they will come home sooner… WRONG! It is exactly the opposite!! Getting out doesn’t always mean going on dates or hanging out with friends. It could be going to your grandmas for a visit, it could be going shopping alone, or it could even be working. Any effort given is well credited.

If you go to church Get a Calling. The best thing that I did for myself was asking the bishop for a calling. Walking into the bishops office I was extremely nervous to have to leave YW’s. I really didn’t want to, and I didn’t want to leave the girls. God really did have a plan for me and he understood what I was feeling. I was able to get a calling just during the Sunday school hour and working with a handicapped girl. I was so excited! And couldn’t wait to write Jordan and express to him how eager I was to work with this girl! I look forward to working with her each week and look even more forward to sharing my stories of this sweet girl with Jordan. Having a calling has really helped me come closer to my Father in Heaven and helped me understand myself even more. Jordan has seen me grow and loves how having this calling has already changed me, for the better.

Number 8 is Learning a New Hobby.  Since Jordan has left my favourite pass times are reading, sewing and baking. Things that I rarely if ever did before he left. Although with school it keeps me from being able to do these things as much as I would like, but I have been able to figure out what I like to do on my own time. And I really do appreciate that time when I get it. And the best part that Jordan has always been supportive of me, when I just needed some time to myself. I really appreciated that about him!

DON’T GET SICK….. Although this is something that is totally incontrollable, do what you can to stay healthy! It is very important not just for you, but him also! When you are sick he is worrying about you and it distracts him from what he should be doing. I use to never get sick, but in the last 3 months I have been sick 3 separate times. The worst part about being sick isn’t the runny nose, or smelling gross, or lying in bed all day because you have a headache. Its missing him. Because when youre sick you long for that comfort, and its missing and you feel like its is going to take double the time to get better because He isn’t there! You mind is constantly on him which makes things drag on even more, and it just sucks! There is nothing good that comes from being sick! Especially for the MG!

I am going to say that 10 is to find a new tv show. I swear, this is the greatest pass time ever!!! And since it’s a new to you tv show, it isn’t “your tv” show which always comes with the memories of watching it together. I find that when you find a really good show you have more than just Mondays to look forward to. It becomes Wednesdays and Thursdays all of a sudden too! So I highly recommend this one!!

Keep a journal! Mostly for your own good, but still. You are able to write about the worst days, and not make him worry. I honestly think that a journal is the best therapy. You don’t have to tell anyone your problems. But youre able to let go. And nothing feels better!!! Don’t make him worry about the things that he has no control over. It just makes him feel helpless, and that he isn’t good enough. That is exactly the opposite of what we are going for! So be supportive when you write him, and complain about the other stuff on your own time in your journal!

                                                 And 12!!!

Spend time with the missionaries in your ward. When Jordan left, a month later my ward received sister missionaries... Although it was only for 3 months, it was the best 3 months ever! I became so close to them, and I felt even closer to Jordan because I was spending time with them. And I definitely will never forget  Sister Hansen, and Sister Wixom! Now with elders back it is much harder as a young woman to spend time with the missionaries. So instead, when I can- I do things for them! I make sure my mom signs up for dinner, I make sure that they are warm in the winter and so on. I feel like if I am caring for the missionaries here then hopefully someone will take care of my boy out there!